New Book At Long Last

Author forum: L-J Baker

Re: New Book At Long Last

Postby Baker » 21 Feb 2011, 07:45

Thanks all.

As a side note: I have discovered that it is not the easiest thing in the world to read galley proofs while owning a young puppy. Just saying. So, if the proofing is crap...blame Max. ;)
Those who can make you believe absurdities can make you commit atrocities ~ Voltaire
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Re: New Book At Long Last

Postby deej » 21 Feb 2011, 07:48

Poor Max, all she's trying to do is get you to relax, and now you're blaming her for errors. Shame Baker, shame on you. rofl rofl rofl
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Re: New Book At Long Last

Postby ElaineB » 21 Feb 2011, 08:07

Just be sure to blame mention her in the acknowledgments. Actually, I feared you were going to say Max ate the galley!
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Re: New Book At Long Last

Postby FranW » 21 Feb 2011, 08:13

Crisco wrote:
FranW wrote:But does anyone in it wear an Armani suit?


You took the words right out of my mouth!! rofl

Congratulations, Baker! :-)


To give you an idea of the book's tone, while Armani itself doesn't feature, the appearance-obsessed male character does seek out and purchase clothes in the Manly-Man(TM) brand. rofl

I'll tell y'all what. You buy the book. If it doesn't make you laugh, I'll refund your money.
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Re: New Book At Long Last

Postby Sacchi » 21 Feb 2011, 13:51

I feared you were going to say Max crapped on the galley.
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Re: New Book At Long Last

Postby Baker » 21 Feb 2011, 17:47

lol The joys of e-galleys, Sacchi. ;)
Those who can make you believe absurdities can make you commit atrocities ~ Voltaire
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Re: New Book At Long Last

Postby ElaineB » 22 Feb 2011, 03:50

I've posted the details and a excerpt in the Sale thread. Check it out. And yes, it should make you laugh.
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Re: New Book At Long Last

Postby FranW » 22 Feb 2011, 06:21

Quoting the excerpt here, for people who don't want to bother clicking to the other thread:
ElaineB wrote:"They chatter all the time. And aren't meek or quiet or submissive or anything. Not like they should be. Not like the gods made them to be. Inferior to man. But do they know their place? There's nothing worse than a woman." The hermit passed a shaking hand over his face. "See. Just thinking about them has made me break into a cold sweat."

"Thanks for sharing that with us," Sandy said. "Now, is there any way we could get you to travel with us for a little while? To the palace. Not for long. And we'd bring you back straightaway."

"Have you known many women?" Bob said.

"That's all they want!" the hermit said. "To get to know you. That means sex. They're insatiable. Voracious. Sex, sex, sex. They can't look at a man without thinking licentious thoughts."

"Really?" Drusilla said. "Your talents don't stretch to mind-reading, do they?"

"I should imagine you'll be safe from ravishment at your age," Sandy said. "Now, what--"

"You're never safe!" he said. "Not from women!"

"Actually," Bob said, "speaking male to male, I can guarantee that you're safe with this pair."

"Pair?" The hermit flicked his stare between Sandy and Drusilla. "Are they--?"

"Dykes," Drusilla said.

"Oh!" The hermit clutched his chest.

"Women who love women," Drusilla said.

"Dru!" Sandy said. "This isn't very helpful. We--"

"You're perfectly safe from our hot, wet, slippery, girl-on-girl desires," Drusilla said.

"Oh!" The hermit's eyes widened and his face turned blue. "Girl on girl..."

"I only think about sex, sex, pulsating throbbing sex," Drusilla said, "when I see a really attractive woman. With large, soft, yielding--"

"Aaarrgh!" The hermit's eyes rolled back in his head and he toppled like a felled tree.

"Shit." Sandy crouched down beside the old man. "Mr Hermit?"

Bob pressed an ear to the hermit's chest. "He's dead."

Sandy stared across the skinny body. "You're joking?"

"No," Bob said. "He's dead. Gone. Curled his toes. Pushing up daisies. Deep sixed. Snuffed it. Heart attack, I'd say."

"Shit." Sandy frowned up at Drusilla. "You killed him. By making him think about steamy lesbian sex."

"Ironic, when you think about it," Drusilla said, "that he'll be getting stiff for the final time because of a dyke."
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Re: New Book At Long Last

Postby ElaineB » 22 Feb 2011, 06:50

Geez, Fran, how lazy do you think we are? ;)
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Re: New Book At Long Last

Postby Athena » 22 Feb 2011, 08:31

Congratulations Baker. :-)
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